yes well i think its time for an update seeing as the give it a name blog is kind of irrelevant so yeah download was great blah blah but now im in israel and everythings well ummmmmmmm israely huzzah right thats the end of this entry

 

 

The plane's cabin was being served by an obviously
gay flight attendant who was just as obviously enjoying
himself.

He came swishing down the aisle and announced to
the passengers, "Captain Marvey has asked me to
announce that he'll be landing this big, scary plane
shortly, lovely people, so if you could just put up
your trays, that would be super."

On his trip back up the aisle, he noticed that a
woman hadn't moved a muscle."Perhaps you didn't hear
me over those big brute engines. I asked you to raise
your trazy-poo so the main man can pitty-pat us on
the ground."

She calmly turned her head and said, "In my country,
I am called 'Princess'. I take orders from no one."

To which the flight attendant replied, without missing
a beat, "Well, sweet-cheeks, in my country, I'm called
'Queen', so I outrank you. Put the tray up, Bitch."

 

Ashleigh your disco ruled! woo happy birthday, and sucks be to the people who didnt come ¬¬.

 

i have sod all else to say, so im just gonna do some funny dots.............................

 

use the comments to tell me about the amusing little things in your lives.

went to town today with hollie af kiz rhi fenner craig n jake... cool enough.

and this chav came an started takin the piss, and then after a load of fightin (verbally) we walked off and her mum () told her to go and spit in my hair so she followed me and instead beat me up!!! aaahhh so im uselessly throwing punches from the floor and after a bit her mum dragged her off and im actually not very hurt *yay* and i met this person who said shed done it to his sister too and he told me to get the police etc so i did and so yeah shes going down hopefully

A guy walks into a bar down in Alabama and orders a Grape
Nehi. Surprised, the bartender looks around and says, "You
ain't from around here. Where you from, boy?"
The guy says, "I'm from Pennsylvania."
The bartender asks, "What do you do up in Pennsylvania?"
The guy responds, "I'm a taxidermist."
The bartender asks, "A taxidermist? What the hell is a
taxidermist?"
The guy says, "I mount dead animals."
The bartender smiles and shouts to the whole bar, "It's OK
boys, he's one of us!"

well, the gig yesterday was shit... we couldnt have moshpits or run around or anything and all the bands were gay

 

c.o.p. backed out and by the time sdcw got on everyones spirits were crushed *hisss* and after all the trouble we went to get the tickets too!

 

still we met fenner ant craig n munchkin and hung out so that was cool :D

okay, so i had a sleepover last night and i barely got any sleep

 

and today i went to this great gig!!! finally, there was lotsa moshing and moshpits an crowdsurfin an stuff, unlike the other one... i was gonna collapse by the end.

 

oh, and before i forget ... all forgotten are one KICKASS band... they covered trivium for starters, woo

 

this one guy kept taking pictures of me and i think im in one of the videos, cant remember for which band. and one random guy called m the headbanger girl :D

 

well anyway we (me stu n cath) have been completely massacred in moshpits and im in pain... seeya

 

/,,/

 

feel free to leave ur gay "u were spazzin, actually" comments once again, whoever you are. Ill feel free to think you're a miserable git.

the sort of person that eat not because they are hungry, but because they have seen someone clever do it.

 

who thinks twice before saying something, not to make sure its right, but to make sure it sounds clever.

 

who quotes shakespeare, and passes it off as their own.

 

who holds strong opinions, not because they agree, but because that's what the media told them.

 

who denies their mistakes and embellishes every good thing they have done.

 

who makes references to books, movies, history, and other things without any reason other than to show they know them.

 

who will get a kick in the face if they get too close to me.

this is an update specially for people with nothing better to do than see what cr*p i have to say.

 

lifes pretty boring at the moment.

 

primary school visit was rubbish as always. this time they saw the badges on my blazer (f*ck off and die, and so f*cking what) and i got told off, blah blah blah, bad influence, what if the kids learnt these words, etc.

 

still it was the last one, im free at last.

 

yay!

 

oh, and i bought the tickets for give it a name in april. it better be awesome.

 

see y'all round.

 

 

so we go to this gig at christ church. im pretty hyped. suddenly....

 

AAAAaargh it turned out to be an emo gig noooooooooo dooom upon doooom but it was ok... yeah...

 

so, there were these bands, and all these emos were standing around being miserable, i mean really, for f*cks sake, move or smile or something, else you might as well be at home, you paid 4 f*cking pounds for the experience!! but im not surprised, emo bands are depressing, there was cult of personality with tiny head guy, tch, bo-ring. (sorry if i offend like every single emo friend i have, but really people!!!)

 

luckily there were some good bands too, SDCW was cool and so was Keralko or whatever their name was (cuteguitaristcuteguitaristcuteguitaristcuteguitaristcuteguitaristcuteguitarist) so me cath kiah an archie moshed out (while all the stupid emos stood around being boring) an now we all have sore necks (...well i dont no bout archie but u no...)  and theyll probably still hurt tommorow even the gig was on SATURDAY goddamit

 

 

 

but it was cool

 

WOOHOO there'll be another one on march 25th!!! hell yeah!!!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

yeah, today was good so i thought id write about it

sad really, but u no

 

first, i'd like to tell you something that i think was amazing: my "buggered blincoe" project in history actually got a commendation!! ... though obviously he's not gonna put it up on the wall.

 

oh, and another thing: the hannah-choubard thing:

hannahs got these pages that are kinda falling outta her daybook, and when mrs choubard checked them recently she didnt notice. as she walked away hannah said (a little too loudly) "she's so stupid, she didnt notice!". when she had finished signing everyones daybooks, she came back to hannah.

"why did you call me stupid, im not stupid" (hurt, retarded voice)

"i didnt call you stupid" (hannahs mind went blank, poor thing)

"yes you diid" (whiny)

"uhh... no i didnt" (noo hannah, doom)

"why am i stupid?" (still whiny)

etc

then, she proved herself stupid at the end of form:

(handing hannah register with evil look) "hannah, go take this to the...uhhh... register place"

i'll never forget the look on her face.. he he he

 

so anyway, today started with assembly, nice and christmassy...

mrs choubard still hasn't noticed that we always move out of register order.. he he he (we have become gail owies, hannah o'razzle and christina offenetti, and kiah stays the same) and then there was german. hannah and i had a logo book fight, and then i got dragged to the LRC to catch up with the last lesson, because i missed it, and couldnt possibly catch up by myself, blah blah blah... grrr.

 

then english, mrs williams came in to talk so we could put forward ideas. but she was just giving us bullsh*t, like when cath asked why girls couldn't do rugby she gave us cr*p on why we have less hours of PE than we used to. wtf??!? so i put my hand up cause i was pissed off, and kept giving her evil looks, until she picked me.

"are you delibarately not givig us the answers and deflecting our questions with unrelated answers?" or something. she gave me this evil stare, and her tone went icy (apparently). then she gave me an unrelated answer, that b*tch. i only realized how 'amazing' this was when she left, and some ppl were like

"gail, how did u do that?"

"what?"

"it's like u and ben switched bodies"

that kinda thing

 

then, ict... we used my website guestbook as a chatroom ( www.freewebs.com/screwcourtneylove if you're the kind of person who reads these things)

 

then lunch, form, home tech and geography, all of which were boring. oh, and spanish, which was extra boring cause hardly anyone turned up :(

 

 

alright heres the basic idea: seven of us (connor, shona, hannah, laura, cath, alice and me) won this thing in french, beating 73 other schools, and it happened to be the hundredth year of this thing happening so they had a 'little' ceremony to celebrate. We  won £36 pounds worth of vouchers which can be used at HMV each, some of you may want to stop reading and go to sulk at this point. I am now going to give you an overview of the day, because alice did and i feel i have more things to gloat about (at least that i remember).

 

we had to wear normal uniform, of course i had my regulation "f*ck off and die" and "so f*cking what" (sorry, filters on these things) badges pinned to my blazer, which miss higgins made me remove ¬¬. I also had music, which i wasnt allowed to listen to in the lectures which sucked. So eventually we arrived at HSBC bank main offices, because they were sponsoring this blah blah blah. We were giving name tags (they got lauras wrong) and stood around at the bottom floor in the space-age building, with me munching on what had been going to be my lunch like a hobo, as it turned out they were going to be feeding us at this event. We were the first school to arrive and stood around for an age, before being escorted to the 41st (!) floor and into a lecture room with glass walls from which we had a perfect view of more tall buildings and roads.

 

We were invited to take soft drinks from the little table at the back, at which point a photographer that looked like some guy they had dragged in off the streets sprang out and took pictures, and then proceeded to follow us throughout the event, pushing me close to sticking his damn camera where the sun don't shine. finally we were all ushered into our seats, and supplied with plans for the day and booklets with an explanation of why the event was being held and a timeline including the year  "radio caroline", the first pirate radio station, was broadcast.

 

Then the speeches started. Some lady that appeared to have been behind the whole thing, which was being run by the british council, gave some talks and introduced people, then some representative of HSBC gave a speech in which he pretended they cared, and then some language assisstants told us some 'amusing' tales. After a few more speeches from the german and french ambassador, we had lunch.

 

Why do they always get these things wrong? we came to eat, not admire the art of the food. there were small balls of god-knows-what, "mystery meat" on little slices of baguette, and then some fruits and some very good chocolate brownies, or something. i tried to eat something that looked like a slice of beef surrounded by animal fat and a pastry, which really would have been alright if laura wasn't standing there going "uuugh i think it moved",  "is it meant to be red in the middle?" and "i think its still alive" as i bit into it. then all of us winstoners just stood there in the corridor, and me and laura had the idea to go "hunt for the loos" (roam around the building but you need an excuse) but everyone else was too chicken shit to come and we couldn't go by ourselves. so we stood there until we were ushered back into the lecture room, when we received our prizes from trevor mcdonald, some famous news presenter, and had yet more pictures taken of us.

 

After yet more speeches, in which the longest one ironically began with "they told me to keep this brief", there was a champagne reception and cake. now we weren't sure if we were allowed any, so i went up to find out... and got stopped as i walked away with a glass. clearly not. i hung around, pretending to take cake, and stole some bubbly and hurried off. soon everyone either had their own glass or was drinking from mine (grr), and once that was finished laura and i went up for more, but got spotted. the bartender guy acted cool by saying hed give us half a glass each but we mustn't tell or he'd get in trouble, and soon enough miss higgins and veronique (the french assistant) had realised and said that we had to stop. suure. once those glasses were finished, we noticed all the glasses had been moved right in front of the bartender so we had no chance. well, after a while catherine started stroking the wals and we all got really giggly, and for some reason i ended up drinking some of trevor mcdonalds champagne when he wasnt there, which was pretty cool. at this point miss higgins decided to take us back before we got worse, saying she didnt want to have to carry me home, muahaha.

 

when we were at the train station laura shona and connor started mucking about on the escalator and someone made an announcement saying "will the schoolchidren please stop endangering their lives" or something like that. then somehow we got a conversation going and i said somethnig and according to catherine my voice went "really deep and squeaky at the same time, like you had a bubble caught in your throat" which i think was pretty cool. unfortunately alice rammed water down mine and catherines throat to sober us up. then me alice and cath met alices mum who took us to some cafe in which i tried to eat this really puffy pastry but only got crumbs all over myself cause im useless at eating them, and then i got a lift home and decided to tell this story to everyone.

 

wahey

watched movies, watched ed play basketball, ate pizza, ate curly fries, and did some other stuff. why am i even writing here? oh yeah, im trying to avoid the POINTLESS HISTORY ESSAY!!!

 

well bye

woohoo this ruled :D

 

...and i didnt even think i would be doing anything today

 

well anyway i went to freak fest with archie hollie joe beth (i think?) hakim and scott, and i just got back home and im too hyper to sleep. so im writing here. like a larry. anyway it rocked they had draven an two other bands an archie went mental and moshed an crowd surfed an stuff all the time an i kinda did but i only actually crowd-surfed once (second time there werent enough ppl and i fell and my trousers kinda fell too). oh and i met tom from my old school and someone else whose name ive forgotten but that said hi to me anyway.

 

well

 

thats it

 

feel free to write comments on whatever crap you remember bout this thing

the website for all courtney love haters!!!

 

www.freewebs.com/screwcourtneylove

 

email me pictures of her being slutty or any incriminating information, plus your name if you wanna be on the list of people who hate her!

 

dont worry, your email address wont be put on the site

 

unless you want it to be

 

in which case

 

tell me

 

and it will

 

..yeah

 

anyway visit the site!

 

ill have a guestbook up in a week, the site isnt old enough yet